Determining and understanding someone’s dominant center of intelligence can be a powerful tool for deepening relationships and fostering better communication. The Enneagram, a model that divides human personality into nine interconnected types, is grouped into three primary centers of intelligence: the Heart, Head, and Body/Gut. Each center perceives, processes, and reacts to the world differently, offering unique insights into how people interact with their environment. Be sure to check out Part 1 of this blog for more information.
The Three Centers of Intelligence
Applying This Knowledge
In the intricate world of the Enneagram, understanding someone’s dominant center of intelligence can greatly enhance your relationships. Whether you’re trying to navigate a friendship, partnership, or family dynamic, recognizing these centers—Thinking, Feeling, and Doing—offers powerful insights. Let’s explore how to determine someone’s dominant center and how to use that knowledge to connect more deeply.
Improve Relationships Based on the Center of Intelligence.
1. Thinking Center: Come off Mute, Personally
If you suspect someone is in the Thinking triad, pay attention to how they process information. They may seem lost in thought, often internalizing their fears and ideas.
Roz Harris insightfully shared:
“You need to literally [help] verbalize personal things that are happening [in their head].”
Encouraging the thinker to “come off mute” is essential. If they struggle to articulate their thoughts or feelings, ask probing questions…questions that will give you insight to what they are thinking. This approach helps them feel understood and opens up their internal world to you.
2. Feeling Center: Acknowledgment is best currency
For someone in the Feeling triad, acknowledgment is the best currency. These individuals thrive on emotional connection and recognition. They may take things to heart easily and require reassurance of their value. One of the speakers captured this beautifully:
By recognizing their emotions, achievements, and simply their presence, you validate their experience and make them feel seen. Whether it’s greeting them warmly or using their name during a conversation, these small acts of acknowledgment can create a powerful connection.
3. Doing Center:
Being clear and direct, even in uncomfortable situations, is often the kindest approach. When you communicate honestly, you avoid creating misunderstandings and prevent unnecessary confusion. This approach respects everyone involved by addressing issues head-on rather than letting them fester. Although it may be challenging in the moment, it ultimately fosters a more open and trusting environment.
What’s Next?
Whether it’s encouraging a thinker to open up, acknowledging the feelings of an empath, or helping a doer embrace uncertainty, these strategies can transform your relationships.
Next time you’re interacting with someone, consider their potential dominant center. Use these clues to guide your conversations, and watch how your relationships flourish with greater understanding and empathy.
Are you ready to start improving your relationships through the wisdom of the Enneagram? Join me in our Masterclass series: Better Relationships by clicking the link below….
Maybe you are just beginning to explore the Enneagram and want to learn the basics first… The links below are a great place to start!
